That's the name of one of my friend's blogs. I like it - because it reminds me that God is in control and I am not - even though sometimes I think I am ;) It also reminds me that no matter what happens, God is using the circumstances of my life to shape who I am and to make me more like Him. But shaping is hard, and it hurts. Stephen and I have been through a lot of hurtful, hard things - we have suffered, but we have also rejoiced. We have rejoiced knowing that I Samuel 7:12 is right - "up til now, God has been faithful" and I just have to trust that He is going to continue to be faithful.
When Stephen and I were going through very hard times, we felt alone - like God was blessing everyone else around us while we suffered with no answers and felt like there was no way out. We felt like there was no one we could share our feelings with outside from God and each other. We felt like no one would understand. This is where I am right now, actually, with what I am dealing with.
I know this sounds ironic, but the true joy has been in times when others have been suffering and going through tough times - and we feel like we can relate! It is like a huge burden being lifted and an immediate connection with another person is created. And we suddenly realize - WE ARE NOT ALONE!!!
But this means I have to be vulnerable and share what I am going through, which is VERY hard for me to do...but if I don't, then I am lonely and ache for someone to understand what I am struggling with - so where does that leave me?? What is my response? Will I hold everything in, or share with a friend?
I think this is what life is all about - connecting with other people. And I have come to realize that the only way to truely connect is when I can share my heart with another person and in turn carry each other's burdens. Funny, this is exactly what God tells us in His Word to do - so why it has taken me so long to realize this??
What do you think? Any thoughts or comments?
6 years ago
2 comments:
Michelle, it is like you read right into my heart. Never have I felt more alone and abandoned by God. I look around us and all our friends here are moving on to bigger and better things (new babies, new houses, new jobs) and Jonathan and I are just stuck here, waiting for something to happen. Sometimes I feel like God is saying, "Take that. See how happy they are? Yeah, you wish you could be half as happy." I know deep down that He is not saying this and that He is in control, but Satan has a way of making me forget that all the time. In reality, it is him that is telling me how horrible and miserable things supposedly are and that God has forgotten all about us. I try to focus on the positive and "count my blessings" but it can be so hard. Wow, this is like the longest comment ever, but your words spoke so deep to my soul. Thank you.
It was so great to see you all this weekend! I can't believe how adorable Titus is! That was so much fun getting together hopefully we can do it more often as the boys get bigger!
I also really appreciated your comments. I have been feeling the same way as well lately. Thanks for sharing that!
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