OK, I know I just posted a pretty serious entry last time, but I have to post an excerpt that I wrote commenting on my sister's blog. I guess because I feel very passionate about this because of my own personal experiences. I think as Christians we are approaching sin the wrong way. Read below and tell me what you think...
"It is hard, because you see yourself failing and others say that you haven't failed at all. They say a good effort is good enough. But I have to disagree.
"If God has really revealed that you were not completely honest in your fast, that is AWESOME that you are willing to admit that...I think as Christians we don't understand the meaning of encouragement...it doesn't mean patting each other on the back and saying, "you're OK, it's not a big deal that you messed up." Because sin is a big deal, and we can't keep downplaying our struggles. Sure, you didn't break the law, lie, or cheat, but you are completely right in your confession - you messed up.
"As Christians, I think we need to accept confessions from our fellow brothers and sisters, and ask how we can help each other from falling into that trap again. I think back to 5 years ago (yikes!) when Stephen and I broke our commitment to not kiss until we were engaged. When we confessed that we had, everyone was like, "Well, about time!" or "It's not a big deal." or just laughed and thought we were funny for even making that type of commitment. Stephen and I really struggled staying pure until marriage, and think that was part of the reason.
"I think that if people would have taken our commitment seriously, when we confessed they should have surrounded us in prayer, asking how they could help us stay away from sin, and not fall into that again. I guess what I am saying is, God convicts us - and it is different for different people...and I think Satan loves it when we downplay each others' failures - it makes it easier to do it again. Yes, we have victory in Jesus, and can't let Satan attack us when we mess up. This is why we need to have people close to us that are going to take our confession seriously - so, don't let Satan get you down with this confession - but pick yourself up and keep going!"
6 years ago
5 comments:
as being one of those people that said "about time" i have reflected on who i was at that time. we were young and immature and while that is no excuse for sin it did leave the doorway to sin open.
today i have learned to confront sin more openly and since i am a youth pastor i end up confronting young and immature people like i was back then, and sometimes still am now.
what i am saying as people grow and mature they approach sin differently. and i think at that age we really were just learning how to approach sin. because we have heard so much of grace, love and acceptance we were trying to do that. rather then what we grew up with repent--or burn in hell.
now that we are older and a little more mature we are learning to balance the confronting and grace part.
i talked about this in my blog a few months ago. check it out under confronting sin. i believe there are three blogs
Michelle, I love how honest you can be. You are so right on with what you said. I think that it must have been really hard for you and Stephen, especially when you wanted counsel and everyone just laughed it off. One thing that I have seen in my experience is that people presume to know what is best for other people, but that is impossible and unfair. And you are right that God convicts everyone differently.
I look back on the person I was in college and how there was such a lack of conviction in my life. Now it is the complete opposite. Simple things that I wouldn't have even thought twice about in college now convict me to my core.
I have really begun to understand that, yes, we are not saved by works, but if we have true faith, the "works" should come naturally. It is so important to live as Christ. We must model our lives after Him and seek out what is best for us. At times, this may mean breaking off relationships that are hurtful or disciplining yourself through prayer. Whatever it may be, each person must also find a person who they can turn to. Hopefully, for those who are married, this will be your spouse. But I also think it is really important to have a friend of the same sex, same faith, etc, who can be there to relate, give advice or just listen.
I completely agree with Nate about learning how to approach sin. In a world so full of sin, we need to be able to see the balance that exists through our faith in God.
I could tell my blog hit a nerve with you when I read your comment. I know that I did not understand why it was a big deal that you and Stephen broke your commitment nor how my lack of understanding would communicate that I did not care about helping you stay accountable. What a great life lesson to beable to share with people. I think you are right in what you say and I applaude you for saying it! Love ya!!!
Hey Michelle, I was just talking to Mary Sue last night about sin, and how confessing sin to others can be embarrassing and humbling, and how God can put different convictions on different people. I actually used you and stephen as my example and told her about how all of us just laughed it off, when really we should have been more supportive and helped you guys stay pure by praying for you. I think its funny that you brought it up today (not funny..ironic)
OK everyone, I definitely did not bring up the past to make everyone feel guilty - I was just using it as an example to illustrate my point about how fellow Christians react to confessed sin.
I think you are right, Nate. We all have grown a lot since then in maturity - but again using my example - even those that I consider great men and women of God, that walked closely with Him, and were very mature still laughed off or down-played our commitment - which brings me back to the main topic that I have been trying to get at - we don't know how to deal with confession.
Kara, sorry about going off on your blog - I probably scared off any other person that might comment on your post. :(
Valerie - after going through all that Stephen and I did, one thing that God revealed to me was that He was going to use our failures and struggles to help other people. So, I am glad that you were able to share with Mary Sue.
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