Well welcome to the world of blogging...all along Michelle has been doing all of our blogging for our family (being that she is at work with access to it all the time) and I would occasionally read a blip here or there (that's being generous)...but now that I have a minute, I want to catch up with times and get with it...so here it goes.
I would like to draw your attention to those people in your life that just drain the energy out of you and you just can't do anything about it...ok so maybe I just want to vent about one of those people in my life. I've got this friend (and I really do mean friend... we have some great times together) who is just to much sometimes. I mean they are always there, having to know what's going on in my life every moment of every day, getting jealous if I spend more time with other friends than with them, even to the point that I've seen them drive by our house just to see if I'm home or not. The worst part about the whole thing is that I can't even confront them about it (I've tried) because they have such low self esteem and feel attacked or that they are a failure. At times I just don't know what to do... I don't want to cut this individual off completely from my life, I just really need some space from them. Any advice?
Stephen
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6 years ago
3 comments:
Hey Stephen! Well that one is a hard one...If this person reads your blog, they might get the picture, but if not...I would just continue to pray about the relationship you have with this person...Maybe a healthy, honest, loving conversation with this person.. may be in order. I'm sure God will give you the opportunity and words if a conversation is needed to "change" the relationship or end it.
Thanks for the advice... I have talked to this person on several occasions and they always feel so attacked...also given our situation, there is no possible way of cutting off contact with the person even if I wanted to... which I don't want to do. It's just a really hard one to deal with sometimes.
I don't have a complete answer, but I do think setting boudaries (for you and this friend) is completely healthy. Have you ever read any of the Boundaries books? It might give you some ideas...
In my opinion, you cannot be responsible for how the other person reacts or feels, so don't allow yourself to "own" that. As long as you speak and act in love and with your friend's best interest at heart too, you have acted responsibly. It may be a time of growth and change for both of you. I know that this issue is especially hard in ministry - more expectations, it seems.
Who I am: My husband and I are friends with (and worked at CWC with) Lynnette and Dave (we were at their going away cookout).
Jaena
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